New

I have never made a New Year's resolution.

I have several reasons for this. Firstly, and I think, mostly--I'm simply far too lazy to think hard enough to evaluate what I feel like I'm not doing right in my life. That takes a lot of honest, deep reflection. I am neither deep nor honest. Deciding that I want to change the failings I've discovered in myself requires humility, and I am not humble. Making a resolution implies action, activity; actively pursuing improvement. And, as I said before, I am simply far too lazy.

Secondly, I know that if I were to make a resolution, I may be enamored of it for the first few days--maybe even a week, although not likely--and then I'll give it up. I basically have pathetic powers of will. I'm not alone in this, I know; health and fitness centers always do the most business the first week or two of the year, and then it tapers off again. I'm pretty sure I'd fail at any goals I set for myself. I hate failing.

Thirdly, why is it only January 1st that change happens? I rebel against a system that encourages such limits on improvement. Or so I tell myself.

And lastly, sometimes I like to think I'm a cool non-conformist. Everyone else makes New Year's resolutions; I'll be different. Especially since I don't want to make one anyway. Then I can tell myself I'm bucking the system. That'll show The Man.

However, this year I'm going to try it. I've been thinking for several weeks that there are things lacking in myself, and I've decided to change that. Specifically, there are things that I am passionate about that I am not committed to cultivating in myself, and I am frustrated with my stasis. I seek growth. I have always sought growth, but have never been dedicated enough to do a whole lot to get it. That changes. Now. I promise.



To The Man: Actually, I made this resolution a week and a half ago. So there.